A borderline personality disorder is a serious mental illness that includes distorted self-image and inability to control emotions. People with this disorder can’t manage their relationships properly due to low mood and high emotional states. Loving someone with borderline is not as easy as it looks.
Your partner with borderline can also hurt you with him/her. It can disrupt your family life and long-term planning. Here at TryArticles, I have discussed the best tips that can help you to love someone with a borderline personality disorder.
Tips To Love Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder
It’s quite difficult to manage a healthy relationship with a person who suffers from borderline. You often get confused by the emotional conversation of your partner. But you can help your partner to cope with mental illness by applying different strategies. You can take the best care of your partner.
Extreme emotional swings can disrupt your mind and you can forcefully think to leave everything that relates with your partner. Mental illness of a person also affects other people. Following tips can help you to cope with borderline symptoms and problems of your partner.
Acknowledge The Reality Of BPD
Maintaining a healthy relationship with your friend, partner or family member is tough and challenging. Firstly, you should know about the BPD to solve the issues with a person who experiences it. People with borderline do not try to hurt you. It is emotional weakness and low mood that can affect you.
Deep psychological distress plays an important role in the severity of borderline symptoms. Do study on BPD and try to understand it thoroughly. Sometimes trauma can cause BPD in people. Always remember that if your partner experienced a trauma in the past then he may suffer from emotional weakness and severe distress.
Of course, having a healthy relationship with a borderline personality is not easy. Your words can create difficulties for you. Understand the roots of BPD and help your partner to recover from it.
People with BPD considered the fragile creatures who do not take care of themselves. It is the misconception about these people. They live in imaginations. Borderline people believe that they need rescuing in the difficult situations. Your rescuing behavior proves your love for the person with BPD.
Rescuing behavior seems good for your partner but later it becomes destructive for both of you. He may depend on you for everything. It can prove threatening for your partner in self-care activities. Stop rescuing behavior so that your partner recover his identity and self-care. Talk to your partner in a calm and relaxing way and ask him/her for self-care.
Identify BDP Behaviours
Identify the BPD in your partner and confirm it from symptoms. You can also confirm this disorder in your partner with the help of a psychiatrist. Know about the symptoms of this disorder and do a study on it. Know the reasons behind the emotional and painful behavior of your partner.
Handle your partner like a professional and don’t lose hope. Control your emotions so you can help your partner to overcome the symptoms of this disorder. Like all personality disorders, borderline proves to be severe from mild for people. Its severity depends on symptoms.
People with BPD use alcohol or drugs as an addiction for self-medication to reduce their pain. Following symptoms can help you to diagnose BPD in your partner.
- Frantic and unreal efforts to reduce abandonment.
- Self-harming behaviors.
- Alcohol abuse.
- Suicidal threats or behaviors.
- Distorted self-image.
- Drug addiction.
- A chronic feeling of emptiness.
Set And Hold Boundaries
BPD is very emotional and painful. It can produce over attachment and fear of abandonment. This emotional pain can equally hurt a loved one. Because of this, it is important to develop trustworthy relationships and set clear boundaries. Set boundaries for your partner so he/she cannot get over attach with you.
Let your partner know that his behavior is unacceptable and hurting for you so he can try to cope with his high emotional states. Don’t allow your partner to use alcohol at home and refuse from hurting conversation and behaviors. Your loving and supporting behavior positively affects your relationship for a borderline partner.
Don’t Show Your Anger
Be patient all the time with borderline people. They have high emotional states that force them for self-harming behaviors. Your anger can hurt your partner. Develop listening ability and try to relax your partner or friend. Your little reaction of anger can destroy good relationships with your partner who has BPD.
People with this disorder do not know to cope with emotional pain. Sometimes abusive behavior creates the feeling of unbearable hopelessness between you and your partner. It can become more complex for you. Some behaviors such as mood swings, low self-esteem, alcohol abuse, suicidal threats, and irritability can destroy your relationship.
These behaviors show that your loved one is actually suffering from BPD. Following tips can help you to remain calm with your borderline partner.
- Don’t argue with your partner.
- Listen to the problems of your partner.
- Relax your mind.
- Control your emotions.
- Don’t show anger.
- Do care for your partner.
- Try to help your partner during a panic situation.
- Don’t show a reaction on abuses.
Encourage The Best Treatment
A borderline personality disorder can prove to be very severe for people or your partner. It is the mental illness that can force you to harm yourself and stops a person to maintain his normal relationships. Having a relationship with the person who lives in his own world of fantasy is not easy.
The feeling of people with borderline remains dysfunctional. Treatment can help your partner to recover from the symptoms of BDP. Some therapies prove very effective in recovery of this disorder. A psychiatrist can truly understand the problems and emotional conditions of a borderline person.
The therapies that can help your partner to recover are following.
- Progressive Muscle Relaxation Therapy (PMR)
- Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT)
- Mentalization Based Therapy (MBT)
- Transference-focused Therapy
- Good Psychiatric Management
- Self-Care Activities
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
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