A person experiences different phases in life, happiness, sadness and many more. Many relations are made and many are broken in the life of a person. Among all, the most difficult phase of a married couple’s life is divorce.
There can be many reasons behind this decision, for the married couple but as adults, they might get over the tough period emotionally, but children become victims of many psychological diseases. They possess a sensitive mind and can easily get in a state of shock while seeing their parents split forever.
Consequences of divorce may not appear at the moment for the adults but they can get into trouble when the children show their affection towards one of the parent. Similarly, they show their disregard towards the other parent because he/she is considered as the responsible for the separation.
The tough behavior enhances this feeling of security and well-being with the father or mother, as in a result, children can be victims of the syndrome of parental alienation. In such cases, one of the parent faces the hate from children.
In this article, we will describe the syndrome of parental alienation and some tips that in this situation what can you do, so read the article till the end.
What Is The Syndrome Of Parental Alienation?
This syndrome is also considered as child abuse. This is termed as child abuse because when a couple gets divorced, one parent exerts the negative influence of the other parent by making negative comments. As a result, the child shows disrespect, unwarranted fear or hostility towards one parent.
While suffering from this syndrome the child feels with a heavy heart that he has to choose between the father and the mother. He feels that by loving one, he deceives the other. So now we can realize that this type of syndrome arises from the persistent behavior in one of the parent by frequent negative messages to the other party.
These messages reflect a bad impact on the child by underestimating the role of other parent which should be in his/her life. There are different aspects of a divorce process that the child should not know and must be hidden. But parents often do this mistake of associating the child with the details of the breakup.
Keep in mind, despite of divorce, your bond as parents is still alive and there are some responsibilities on you being parents.
Causes Why Your Child Does Not Want To See You
Below are mentioned, some of the causes.
As the children posses sensitive nature they may tend to overprotect one of their parent, showing greater disinterest towards the other. For instant, if a girl is worried about her mother’s sadness about the separation with her father, then it is very possible that the child suffers isolation and does not want to go out because she is afraid that she will not have fun during her absence.
Identification With The Place
Sometimes, it may also happen that the child feels more identified with the place where he/she has been living. The environment of friends, the neighborhood, the relatives nearby, the house and the security of that context have more attraction and affection for him/her and he/she doesn’t want to leave it.
Rebellion In Adolescence
The child need to adapt to a new environment while leaving with the other parent and it is possible that he shows a negative attitude towards this change. This situation is the horizon of the stage of rebellion in adolescence. He can act differently such as stop talking to one of his parent as a challenge to his authority. They tend to impose their own rules against external limits.
What To Do If My Son Does Not Want To See Me?
If your child rejects you and does not want to see you under any circumstances, you can implement the following tips:
- The very first step that parents should do, is to identify the specific cause of the situation since, this can help in finding one or more solutions depending on the reasons. Whatever the situation is, it is important to seek the collaboration of the other party and to stop underestimating the role of other part in the child’s life. Act as a team as it determines clear principles of family education.
- Sometimes, it may be necessary to seek the help of a family mediator. With knowledge and experience, he will help parents to improve communication between them and the ways to conquer their disputes since, this influences in a positive way in the family system itself. However, in such situations, there must be a person who has the unconditional trust of the father and mother. A very important role as source of support to advance in the dialogue is played by the mediator.
- From the point of view of custody, if you are facing inconvenience to see your child in the schedule of visits, it is recommended to consult information with a lawyer who is expert in the matter. He will guide you about what your rights and obligations in this circumstance and what legal avenues you can take to solve the conflict.
- In case, your child is an independent adult who has made the decision to live alone or away from you then try to talk to him. Things he likes to do, you must pay attention and show your interest in that. Occasionally, remind him that you will always be there for him. Try to achieve his trust that everything will be fine.
- Consultation with a child-youth psychologist is highly recommended in this case. Since as an expert in the subject, they can analyze the situation in a personalized way, also giving you the appropriate guidelines to act in the following context. In this circumstance you must also take care of yourself as these situations produce a lot of suffering.
If you liked my post about the tips that one should adopt if his/her son does not want to see him/her then let us know about your experience, in case you have any query then hit it down in the comments section. For more articles of your interest, you may visit Psychology category at TryArticles.